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Welcome to Miss Molly and Aspergers! :)

Hello there, welcome to my blog Miss Molly and Aspergers! My name is Molly and I am a teenage girl with Aspergers Syndrome.

I have created this blog to help create awareness of Autism Spectrum Disorder.

TIP: Search Aspergers on Facebook and you will find dozens of amazing communities and support networks! If you choose to interact in one of these communities, you may even make some great friends who are also Aspies, like I have.

Why you may find use in my blog:
Insight, support, self-research/experience and understanding (awareness) will be covered in the content of Miss Molly and Aspergers, including the following subjects and more:

- Bullying/dealing with peers
- Surviving in social situations
- Hobbies/Obsessions and Interests
- School/Life
- Communication - Social skills - Understanding spoken and unspoken language norms.
- Sensory Issues/ sound, smell, sight, taste, feel, (textures) - the ability to experience heightened senses - and coping with the strong diversions (intolerance)
- Importance of Routine and Structure
- Friendships
- Coping with Meltdowns and dealing with the aftermath (consequences - I.e Social embarrassment)
- Dealing with people who do not acknowledge the existence of The Autism Spectrum (ASD). People who therefore are unable to acknowledge the rhyme and reasons for your differences.

Copy Cats Beware

© Molly Tylor and Miss Molly and Aspergers, 2013-2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Molly Tylor and Miss Molly and Aspergers with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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Friday, July 25, 2014

Common Aspergers & ASD Traits

Hi All!
I have been thinking it would be a good idea to refresh people of the traits of Asperger’s and what being an Aspie entails. It has been awhile since I have made a post on the overall aspects of Asperger’s, so I feel a refreshment is in order!
What it means to have Asperger’s/ Common Aspie Traits: (these traits are often disputed in different orders and combinations (no one Aspie will share all of the same traits)
1 . Lack of or too much eye contact.
2. Talks a lot about their interests, loves to share!
3. Has obsessive interests that are a huge part of their life and career aspirations. (I.e. If an Aspie is into computer programming, they will most likely aim to achieve their highest in this area. Thus, making it their career field).
4. Has an extremely good long term memory and a not so good short term memory. This includes things which are of great interest to an Aspie’s mind or caused a significant emotional effect such as bullying experiences. We can remember even the smallest of those details such as the person’s name, despite having experienced this in grade 1. The same applies for vice versa, such as a person who contributed an amazing and gratifying effect on our lives or were an extremely compassionate person that one would be immensely appreciative of encountering. These memories are likely to stick to our mind, being permanently glued to our subconscious and will unlikely be forgotten.
Our short term memory however, is compromised at times. Normally because of ideas and thoughts pertaining to an interest or desire. Therefore, anything that’s not interesting to us at the time will go in one ear and out the other whilst other ideas are playing on our mind.
5. Different sense of humor (can find the strangest of things amusing or funny)
6. Has sensory issues to do with a heighten sense of sound, touch ,feel, taste, and sight.
7. Can have trouble communicating their needs or intentions (a common occurrence is being misinterpreted by other people. Also misinterpreting ourselves, the intentions of others, and their motives.
8. Delayed responsiveness in situations (has a longer processing time)
9. Coordination issues can be common too.
10. An intense need of routine and familiarity. One often becomes distressed when changes are made or are unexpected. As we grow older we can learn to adjust to changes. Compared to NT’s who adjust drastically, Aspie’s tend to require more time to gradually develop the ability to adjust and cope with change. (stepping stones, rather than a large meteorite)
Well, that's a few pointers for now. Thank you for reading as usual! Have a nice weekend!
- Miss Molly x

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Sensory Overload

Hello again!

So what are sensory issues/ overloads?

Many people who have Autism and Aspergers can have a heightened sense of, taste, touch, sound, feel and sight.
A sensory overload is a common cause of a 'Meltdown'. This is typically a result of having to deal with a real dislike and discomfort of certain textures and the inability to function and process too many sounds and sights at once. Outbursts are common in such situations because processing becomes extremely difficult. Aspies can fall behind in class or misunderstand instructions due to these sensory issues. This results in further trauma as those who do not understand 'sensory issues/overloads' (teachers, class mates, authority figures) will deem the behaving Aspie as rude or misbehaving. When in fact their behaviour is a result of having a 'sensory overload' not an intention to misbehave.

My Experiences (may be different to other Aspies):

1. I can not process more then one sensory situation at one time.
For example: If two or more people are talking in the same room as me, while I try to watch the television. It deems as an impossible task for me to do.

2. I have experienced having my little sister make noises and crack silly jokes at me while I am on the phone to someone. In these situations I fail to interpret all of the information said by the person on the other end of the line.

3.Sudden and very unexpected noises will cause me to freak out physically. I have felt embarrassed on many occasions after my body has experienced jolts and spasm like movements. This is due to the arise of an unexpected loud noise, thus having no prior knowledge of needing to interpret.

4. Smell. I often smell things earlier or stronger then other people. My sense of smell is heightened. Example: If the fireplace had been lite and caused some smoking; even though my family believe the smell had dissipated, I can continue to smell its linger for days. Many times I have said 'I can smell....." And people would reply "I don't know what're you're on about".


5. Sight- I can not handle a sudden image or object coming in close proximity of my line of sight or from a blind sight. This is similar in the way of noises - unexpected or loud in movement.

6. Touch/Feel- Textures are a big issue for Aspies. Certain feelings are uncomfortable and make it difficult for to us to maintain a sense of comfort.
As a young girl (and still to this day), I removed tags and strings off clothing and could not handle the feel of thick wool jumper and oily feelings on my hands (finger food. I.e. chicken drumsticks).
These oily textures are unpleasant for me and other Aspies. Having to deal with these feelings are often avoided by using eating utensils, gloves or cleaning my hands straight after consuming.
I also could not stand handling fish bait with my hands as the feel and smell would be obvious to me on my hands for an extensive periods of time afterwards. I remember trying to get the smell out of my hands with vinegar after coming home from fishing, even when others would perceive your hands as being 'clean'.
Many times whilst road traveling, my mum had to stock up on wet wipes for me, or I would be irritable if I couldn't clean textures off my hands.
Also dish washing can be unpleasant for me too. As I get frustrated with not being able to get the oiliness out of dishes and then having to deal with the dry and funny feel of my hands afterwards , as a result of this and the soapy hot water.

Conclusion:
So basically sensory issues are a heightened sense of feel, and the difficulty of interpreting numerous noises/movements/instructions. Having these heightened senses, when an unexpected noise and sight occurs, it is in reason to be frightening and a struggle to deal with.
For these reasons many Aspies avoid big crowds, loud concerts, night clubs, 3D-Movies, shopping centers and public transport. Sensory overloads in these areas in particular are common for us. As well as avoiding over powering fragrances, certain clothing textures, certain foods, toiletries and products.

Thank you for reading!
Question: Do you have any sensory issues or sensory overload experiences to share?

x Molly

Importance of a Comfortable and Organised Environment

Hello !
Today I want to share with you the importance it is for me personally to have an orderly and pleasant environment to live, work and relax in.
Today after many months of having the same room arrangement, it began to clutter and accumulate dust under and behind furniture, as well the general system of my room beginning to slack. I also feel making a change like this is a good way of welcoming in new good and positive opportunities (mood, life, productivity, etc). As having the same room arrangement through troubled times and/or depressive periods. It generally keeps and preserves that negative mood set for me. So in order to change that mood set, I changed my room, the soul environment I wake up in and go to sleep at night. I feel so uplifted, motivated, relaxed and happy with my new space now.

Today I changed my room completely around and cleaned it up.
I cannot sleep or work in an environment that is not kept.
As well as the importance of cleanliness and organisation. I like to make my room my own special space and retreat to enjoy. Candles, ornaments, soft blankets, cute containers, pictures, posters, incense, and my fashion and stationary items kept neatly and niceness are what make an enjoyable space for me.

Aspies either thrive in an orderly environment or need not attend to keep an orderly environment at all to feel comfortable in.

However this is my preference and organisation is the best way for me to stay motivated and relaxed.

Here are the pictures of the finished result! Including my new water fountain (relaxation purposes), dream catcher, candles and my new jewellery storage cupboard :)
You can also see my feature wall of my 'works'. Including my Drawings and Photography and Digital Productions.








I would love to know whether you 'require your environment to be clean and pleasant" or 'you don't mind it to be not kept'

Hope you all enjoy the rest of your weekend.
Bye for now,
x Miss Molly

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Positives of Having an Aspergers Friend

1.What you see is what you get:
(Excluding first time social situations).As Aspies we can have time periods where our full selves gradually evolve around you. 
When we meet people for the first time we reserve ourselves to start with. I guess its a natural instinct for all really. To summarize: If you have known an Aspie for at least a few months and had regular social interaction with them and you can observe they are comfortable around you. Then its pretty certain by this time you have seen all of who we are. We cannot contain ourselves (personality traits) for excessive periods of time around people we begin to feel comfortable with. So rest assure, we are who we appear to be. 

2. Loyalty:

We are extremely loyal to people who are good to us. We go through life exploring for good friendships, with many heartbreaks along the way. 
When we meet a good person, we will appreciate their friendship to the very end. However our loyalty is not to be taken advantage of, which is fair enough. No one should be obligated to stay loyal to an loyal friend, whether you have Aspergers or not. Saying this, it can take a great length of time for an Aspie to realise a toxic friend. We can be easily fooled by sweet smiles. We are a target for people with two-faced syndrome haha. This is due to our belief of seeing the best in others. Though when we do finally realise, we will move on and look forward to meeting new people with mutual respect and loyalty. My point is we value good friends extremely well, and stay true to you for as long as you are true to us.

3. Fun and Humour:

We can have an unpredictable sense humor and the ability to surprise you at anytime. This makes for unforgettable memories of fun and good times. Only two weeks ago, my neurotypical best friend and I were reciting memories from 1-2 years ago. These moments we had were just too good to forget. We laughed all over again like it was yesterday. Maybe I will mention some of our funny moments sometime soon.

4.Trustworthiness/Honesty:

People with Aspergers find it very difficult to tell lies; we can, although eventually we will reveal the truth. The majority of these will be little white lies, technically harmless. However we can not hold on to the guilt for very long, no matter how small it is.
However our honesty should not be mistaken, as we are extremely trustworthy with other peoples issues. To this day; I have kept my first time best friend's crush a secret, since primary (elementary) school (2006). (one of hundreds of examples). I have actually forgotten the fellas name, proof of how long its been. You can 100% rest assure in the fact, you can talk to me about anything and I have and forever will keep my word. My best friend Hannah is my referee hehe.

5. Uniquness

It is very likely if you have an Aspie friend they may stand apart from mainstream influences just a little bit or maybe a lot.
Typically you may notice we may have a different dress sense or taste in music not typical to our peers. For example I love vintage clothing and 70's and 80's rock music. I love Guns and Roses, Bon Jovi, Cold Chisel and Fleetwood Mac (a few examples). 

I have met many Aspies with such interests/hobbies/obsessions:

- Science, Computer Programming, Art, Mathematics, Biology, Geometry, Space, Nature, Photography, Creative Writing, Animals, Conservation. Just to name a few.

Additional information about our interests:

When an Aspie becomes interest in a subject, it usually, in most cases becomes our life long aspiration. Because of this, we can process, learn and teach knowledge about these particular subjects to a professional level. When we are passionate about such things we can excel at them. We have a tendency to focus to extreme. Sometimes you may not see me for days, as I will be working away on a passion of mine. Historic scientists have been rumored to have had Aspergers or were savants (savants are people who have extreme forms of Aspergers - usually gifted to the max with one thing and no ability to perform at anything else). They hid away from society to such an extent because of their focus and determination of their passions. This resulted in such things as light bulbs being invented haha. 

As usually this post has gone off subject just a tiny bit haha. I cannot retain myself from given the most detail possible, whether it fits in to context or not. 


Hope you liked this post, and have a good day :)

Thursday, May 8, 2014

My almost 18 years - Share and Tell

Hi There :)
I am extremely overwhelmed! I will be 18 years old this coming Friday (1 week away exactly!)!
I am so astonished by how much I have already fit into my life even before reaching adulthood.

I have completed my secondary education and have begun developing my dream career, after so much anticipation.

I have lived all over Australia, including very rural and isolated places due to my mum being an Art Teacher.
I have met new relatives in 2013 after moving to Perth from Queensland Australia. I discovered I have lots of second and third cousins I never new of. I also met my Great Aunty for the first time.

Some highlights of my life so far:
  • At 9-10 years old. I lives on an aboriginal community known as Wadeye or Port Keats. We were living in a town isolated from everywhere because of bush land, un-cemented roads (corrugated), waterways etc.

  • I learnt many words of Murranpatha, the local Indigenous language. I had confrontations with wild salt water crocodiles! I experienced so much there, especially involving the bush life. I went tucker hunting with the locals, fishing, scavenging, swimming in water holes and a lot more!

  •  Another amazing experience; Once I was allowed by the pilot of our small plane, from Wadeye to Darwin City, to be seated in the cot pit with him! of course I didn't get to fly the plane but it was exciting to have a front view!

  • In 2008 I became an Aunty for the first time on Christmas Day! A couple years following, I became an Aunty of two! :)

  • I have studied through numerous Distance Education programs, I had my own classroom at home set up for me. In Rainbow Beach it was situated in the shed.
  •  I vividly remember when a 2 and a half meter Python slithered past the garage door. I rolled it down and stayed trapped inside until mum came out and luckily the Python had moved on.
  • Our house here attracted many critters due to the fact our back yard directly entered the local national rainforest. These other critters include: Meter long Goannas, Bush Turkeys, Spiders and poisonous snakes. I remember being chased around the house too many times by Goannas because they wanted food.

  •  I went to North Keppel Island in Queensland for a School Camp when I was 13 years old. It was brilliant! I lived on this island in a cabin with other students for 5 days.
Experiences I had on NK Island:
  • Snorkelling, cannoning, plankton trawling, swimming mid deep in the bay between North Keppel and Yeppoon.

  • Places I have lived include:
Darwin NT, Geraldton WA, Boddington WA, Fremantle WA, Kambalda WA, Mangoplah NSW, Hervey Bay QLD, Boonooroo QLD, Rainbow Beach QLD, St Helens TAS, Tom Price WA.

I have made and left a trail of life long friends all over the country due to my family's gypsy habits.

I have many, many, many more stories/experiences to share. These however are the first ones that came to mind, therefore they must be the most valuable ones to share. However I have many more experiences I could tell you which will be worth your entertainment.

I will most definitely make a post after my 18th Celebrations! As I am sure I have some lovely presents coming my way and a surprise birthday cake my little sister is making for me. Not only that I will have the good company of family and good friends!

xx Molly


Thursday, April 24, 2014

An update after many months...

Hello,
I have not been here in so long, I have had a very eventful past six months... I know its four months into the new year, almost five! Happy New Year!! Hehe.
So before I begin some new and more interesting posts to do with... living with Aspergers.

I certainly think I should give an update on what has been happening for me:

  • I got accepted at the beginning of this year... into my dream course... An Advance Diploma of Jewellery Design. Which goes for 3 years!

  • I got awarded a scholarship which has significantly helped me with my course materials costs. Jewellery production... especially due to the use of precious metals... is very expensive.

  • I met my long distance boyfriend for the first time in person this year! He is also an Aspie which is amazing, in the fact we relate and understand each other.

  • I discovered I have a talent in drawing and I have kept up with my photography.

  • I have developed independence... as far as... travelling with public transport, and using my initiative to get to any place I need or want to go. My mum explains how proud she is of me. :)

  • I have made new friends and am finding my new adult education atmosphere a blessing. It is amazing how different it is to high school. It is so nice to be somewhere where people have mutual interests, ideas and hobbies.

  •  I turn 18 years old in 21 days! Can you believe I created... Miss Molly and Asperger's when I was 15!



Please feel free to share your new years news too ! :)

~ Miss Molly x




Thursday, January 9, 2014

Suicide is not your only option!

How do you keep going, when all hope seems lost? How to keep picking up the pieces, when you've picked them up again and again all your life.
Life is a journey, an obstacle course, yes it can be hard, very hard, to the point... That last option is playing in your mind on repeat. My dad could not handle lifes obstacles. I know he was just one of many many! And there it is! the use of 'past tense'... 'Was'..The reality he or the loved one you have lost, is not here anymore, here as a living person. 
Yes, people do care, you may not realise it, or maybe that few monority of people who 'don't care, ie bullies' have convinced you that all do not care. 
Now step out of your shoes for just a minute, I know this may be very difficult, your disconection from the positive, your sense of 'nothing is worth it anymore' ...does indeed affect your judgement. 
Are you a mum, a dad, a sibling, an aunty, uncle, cousin, grandparent, a best friend, a lover? How are these people going to feel? The ones who do care? And believe me they do! You not only take away your life, but you take away a massive chunk of theirs too. What do you think is going to be their reaction, when they hear your pronounced death? How would you deal knowing one of these very close people to you...couldn't handle life anymore? That you will live the rest of your life, only having their memories... Thats it, memories.. memories you will live over and over each time you are trigged with the thought of your loved one. And the endless thoughts of what the future could have been for them and.. You. 

I think about my dad... I think about the way he chose to end his life.. The way that has left me utterly devistated... and how he isn't here anymore to see how I have grown up... Into the person I have become... He isn't here to see how even though, things have got extremely hard at times for me... I kept going... And I wish more then anything I could have been there to convince him... 'Life will get better, hold on'... Because its true. Life does get better. I am not saying, that you won't see any more of the obstacles life dishes out... Because no one can promise you that... But I can promise you... If you stay and stick around for lifes journey... You will encounter the best things of life yet to come... You will see that its worth it! Holding on through the negative will make you even more grateful for the positive moments and endless posibilities that are within your reach... But they won't be, if you take away your life, all those possibilities will vanish... Along with you.

 Suicide is not the only option you have!

These obstacles are here for a reason. If life was so easy for everyone, would we really be living? If there were no obstacles, we would just be simply existing.. Because we wouldn't know what the good things are or how to appreciate them... If everything life throws out was easy!
The things we come across in life, are lessons that are learnt and to be learned, they are the very things that teach us how to appreciate the good.
Every bad experience you have paths your path of life... They allow you to build youself into the person you are meant to be. Don't end it here! 

If you are feeling suicidal, Right in this moment, please call someone for help, and I mean really call for help! an emergency department!!
If you are feeling depressed and hopeless talk to your family, your friends and/or seek professional help! 
Be reasured! 
People are here! They are here for you! They care!!! Don't give up! The is so much more life has to offer you!

--Molly xxxx